You maybe thought she was it.... the one...the IT GIRL.....oops.....i guess no one warned you huh...how she really ones, maybe no one knew, maybe she had them all fooled, and then you...what did you do to deserve and "love" like this? its been a while with her, what happened, what carried your heart out to sea, far away from the warmth aftropical island ,love? Time happened i guess....no not time....truth, unveiling, the removale of that secret screen where the lies were piling up maybe...i dunno....maybe the lies were screaming so loud, you finally heard them.....
Maybe it was HER or HER that recaptured your attention, or maybe they brain washed you. Who was the real tadpole, and who is the real sharks...who was acting like a dolphin in sharks skin...or a shark in dolphins skin. Have you no pride, dignity, fareness? how cruel of you, how smart of you....how misunderstanding of you...how perfectly clear of you. Fool, you can cut off the fishing line now, but the hook will remain in your skin forever, now your bound to her by a fate that will live past your own prime....idiot. A little to much, and a little to late...smart then, dumb now.....idiot.
Friday, February 29, 2008
HER
My hearts not broken, i guess this is something you could argue with after reading my past blogs. Yes it has BEEN broken, but the ice around it has frozen it back to its original cold self....so the blogs, the words, the pain that i write into these blogs...where does it come from you mite ask me...that's simple......
Him..her...her..him and him and her and her and him and all of them,.....there people I know, the people i love, the people i see....love boarders itself from me, I am limited to the knowledge of what love can create and destroy, but I see it, I may not feel it, I hear it, but i can not feel it. Is that true? that i don't feel feel it, that i cant...if that was the case would any of this touch anybody....does it? If love were a piece of land it would be tropical, full of green palm trees, wild plants, plentiful food, white sand and sparkling oceans.....I'm in the north pole...that's how far love seeks to be from me. Again, I'm writing about love...i guess i just watch for it. like when a mother leaves the outside lamp burning waiting for her husband to return from war, or hunting...my lamp swings in the chilled air of a snowy dessert...in this case its called my heart.
Curse this thing called love.....
Lets start with her.....
I'm sorry this happened to u, I'm sorry your heart has been ripped from your chest, stomped on while lying in a puddle of blood and left there for all the world to see its damages. what a cruel world for you...hmm..karma....whats left of your soul maybe unrecognizable, i don't think i know you anymore. does it hurt...yes i know it does, you tell me this... to leave you on that fishing line, a little tadpole in a pool of sharks..how could he.....why would he...bored....annoyed.....hmmm Karma...is this the worse pain you feel i wonder, could this pain get worse? it can get worse all the time, as long as u still have pieces of your soul....when u no longer feel such pains * like me* your soul has been devoured by your own insecurities, by the unloved that eat at Ur heart, when the last pieces of shattered and someone came with the broom, swept it up and threw it away * I didn't notice when that happened to me* Oh how painful it is right now..to look up at the sky, to look to Ur left, right and all around u...I'm sure it all reminds u of him...how sad.....hmmm....karma...
Him..her...her..him and him and her and her and him and all of them,.....there people I know, the people i love, the people i see....love boarders itself from me, I am limited to the knowledge of what love can create and destroy, but I see it, I may not feel it, I hear it, but i can not feel it. Is that true? that i don't feel feel it, that i cant...if that was the case would any of this touch anybody....does it? If love were a piece of land it would be tropical, full of green palm trees, wild plants, plentiful food, white sand and sparkling oceans.....I'm in the north pole...that's how far love seeks to be from me. Again, I'm writing about love...i guess i just watch for it. like when a mother leaves the outside lamp burning waiting for her husband to return from war, or hunting...my lamp swings in the chilled air of a snowy dessert...in this case its called my heart.
Curse this thing called love.....
Lets start with her.....
I'm sorry this happened to u, I'm sorry your heart has been ripped from your chest, stomped on while lying in a puddle of blood and left there for all the world to see its damages. what a cruel world for you...hmm..karma....whats left of your soul maybe unrecognizable, i don't think i know you anymore. does it hurt...yes i know it does, you tell me this... to leave you on that fishing line, a little tadpole in a pool of sharks..how could he.....why would he...bored....annoyed.....hmmm Karma...is this the worse pain you feel i wonder, could this pain get worse? it can get worse all the time, as long as u still have pieces of your soul....when u no longer feel such pains * like me* your soul has been devoured by your own insecurities, by the unloved that eat at Ur heart, when the last pieces of shattered and someone came with the broom, swept it up and threw it away * I didn't notice when that happened to me* Oh how painful it is right now..to look up at the sky, to look to Ur left, right and all around u...I'm sure it all reminds u of him...how sad.....hmmm....karma...
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Thursday, February 21, 2008
spring forward
so ho-hum here comes the spring.....they say that at this time of year just like the birds and the bees, humans come out to play. The sun shines more, poeple are out and about more, leaving there house hold dungeons where most of hibernated thru the winter months...
Not me.....
I never was one to understand all the lovy dovey stuff at spring time, and as far as i can remember now, i wasnt ever looking for a bf for sooo many reasons...but this spring..this year..2008 is different some how, i dont kno why and i cant explain it, but i think the spring love thing is gettin to me. I never wanted a BF right now for that fact that i KNOW im not staying here, and i have HUGE plans, and as far as im concered, you get a bf and in a few years all your plans change cause u have this relationship...no offence guys, but what makes u so special that have to change my entire life path to be loved...ok maybe that sounds a little harsh, im not sure, but i want a guy who will move with me not agaisnt me. The other problem is people change there life paths constantly until they set it in stone, this i kno cause i have changed mine about 30 times. Im 100% certain of what I want to do now, i guess thats why im waiting for love, wait until im setteled down more.....but again...this feeling....this year,i cant help shaking the feeling that ive been pushin love off for so long now, and it kinda let me....but now...im not so certain im can fight it anymore, better yet i dont think im allowed to. maybe some higher power has been telling me to push off love this long, because i kno and it knows that my heart is very strong, and i was goig to be one of the lucky ones to have my soulmate....what a fairy tale huh, but we all have to beleive in somthin...and if your gonna dream, might as well dream big... so I kno some guys that like me...but i guess there not the one..like i can feel the wind forcing itself, just like the chinooks force itself upon the frozen snow, it melts it, just like this force is a chinook wind on my frozen ice incrusted heart...why do i suddenly now seek love, tho not of that which is infront of me, but that of wich i kno is on its way.....maybe....maybe it was ....him......maybe it was he who melted it, opened up somthing that only he ended up having the key to. As fate allowes it maybe he is the only one to pass thru my soul, where no one else could....or was allowed....when he looked at me..i saw somthin, i felt somthin not familiar....maybe this is where its started, where the small chinook breeze began. oh how complicated our hearts are...such a curse a organ made to keep us alive, but an emotion to either bond us or destroy our being...im gonne welcome spring this year, like i do any other year...except this year...maybe i can except love,.....maybe i can make a SMALL difference in my life, to allow it, i think im suppose to now, someone or somthing is saying its time....i hope im not being taken up to high.....for the higher you are, the longer and harder you fall....
Not me.....
I never was one to understand all the lovy dovey stuff at spring time, and as far as i can remember now, i wasnt ever looking for a bf for sooo many reasons...but this spring..this year..2008 is different some how, i dont kno why and i cant explain it, but i think the spring love thing is gettin to me. I never wanted a BF right now for that fact that i KNOW im not staying here, and i have HUGE plans, and as far as im concered, you get a bf and in a few years all your plans change cause u have this relationship...no offence guys, but what makes u so special that have to change my entire life path to be loved...ok maybe that sounds a little harsh, im not sure, but i want a guy who will move with me not agaisnt me. The other problem is people change there life paths constantly until they set it in stone, this i kno cause i have changed mine about 30 times. Im 100% certain of what I want to do now, i guess thats why im waiting for love, wait until im setteled down more.....but again...this feeling....this year,i cant help shaking the feeling that ive been pushin love off for so long now, and it kinda let me....but now...im not so certain im can fight it anymore, better yet i dont think im allowed to. maybe some higher power has been telling me to push off love this long, because i kno and it knows that my heart is very strong, and i was goig to be one of the lucky ones to have my soulmate....what a fairy tale huh, but we all have to beleive in somthin...and if your gonna dream, might as well dream big... so I kno some guys that like me...but i guess there not the one..like i can feel the wind forcing itself, just like the chinooks force itself upon the frozen snow, it melts it, just like this force is a chinook wind on my frozen ice incrusted heart...why do i suddenly now seek love, tho not of that which is infront of me, but that of wich i kno is on its way.....maybe....maybe it was ....him......maybe it was he who melted it, opened up somthing that only he ended up having the key to. As fate allowes it maybe he is the only one to pass thru my soul, where no one else could....or was allowed....when he looked at me..i saw somthin, i felt somthin not familiar....maybe this is where its started, where the small chinook breeze began. oh how complicated our hearts are...such a curse a organ made to keep us alive, but an emotion to either bond us or destroy our being...im gonne welcome spring this year, like i do any other year...except this year...maybe i can except love,.....maybe i can make a SMALL difference in my life, to allow it, i think im suppose to now, someone or somthing is saying its time....i hope im not being taken up to high.....for the higher you are, the longer and harder you fall....
Tears unknown
Im sorry she hurt you....
Im sorry she made you cry.....
Im sorry that she was the reason to bring tears to your eyes.......
Im sorry she made you cry.....
Im sorry that she was the reason to bring tears to your eyes.......
Sunday, February 17, 2008
You kno its over when
Her: " I don't kno what to do, i dont want to feel like thing anymore, why cant he just say he loves me and kiss me....why does he treat me like this...."
Friend: Get up and tell him your leaving, maybe that will knock some sense into his head and make him realize how importnat you are to him.
Her: He wont do anything, i know he wont, he gets mad at me for asking how he is feeling...
Friend: " just try it, c'mon its worth a shot..
Her: " No, cause i kno he will just shrug and let me walk out...
Friend: If your so sure about that, the what the fuck are you fighting for anymore?
Friend: Get up and tell him your leaving, maybe that will knock some sense into his head and make him realize how importnat you are to him.
Her: He wont do anything, i know he wont, he gets mad at me for asking how he is feeling...
Friend: " just try it, c'mon its worth a shot..
Her: " No, cause i kno he will just shrug and let me walk out...
Friend: If your so sure about that, the what the fuck are you fighting for anymore?
Saturday, February 16, 2008
Past, present, future
Ur only in love wih the right person, for right now....cause im the person for right then, and forever
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
